you are worthy of love and belonging.

Since sharing about my mental health journey on social media a month ago, I’ve had a bit of a vulnerability hangover as Queen Brené Brown would say… but I am also so, so grateful for how my post opened up conversations with friends of mine who have had similar struggles and felt comforted in knowing they’re not alone. Some have asked what I do now to manage my mental health and as I’ve pondered that question, I’ve realized it really boils down to one thing:

Challenging the inner gremlin that says I am not worthy of love and belonging.

When it comes down to it, my struggles with anxiety and depression all started with that misbelief. 

So each day, I work to challenge the gremlin and show myself that I AM worthy of love and belonging. I do this by striving to 1) love myself and 2) believe that others love me too. And for me, that looks like the following:

• A daily yoga practice. This helps me to practice mindfulness (being in the present) AND be in tune with my body. Win-win. 
• Daily scripture study and prayer, which double counts for spiritual nourishing and meditation. Taking the time to really ponder and write out my thoughts helps me to feel more centered.
• Making time to develop new and old friendships. This has been huge for me in Paris. I’ve struggled with anxiety for years but after a few months of being here, I knew I’d really have to push myself to make friends or I’d be miserable here. So I did. And I don’t think I’ve ever been happier (and to my sweet friends here: I am so grateful for you). The more people you know and love, the better life is. That’s a fact.
• Making time for hobbies. I don’t feel like myself when I’m not doing the things I love and that make me come alive. Even if it’s just taking pictures of beautiful things I notice while I’m out and about, I feel so much better. 
• Being okay with having to say no sometimes. I don’t have to be 100% 100% of the time. And so that means I have to turn things down sometimes—and that is perfectly fine. I find it really important to be aware of my needs and whether or not I can handle another task or event. 
• Not feeling guilty for resting when I need to. Again, I don’t have to be 100% 100% of the time. It’s okay to be a little bit lazy sometimes. :)
• Find ways to look outside myself. There’s nothing like the bolt of joy that surges through you when you’re serving others. 
• When I’m really struggling, I make sure to talk to someone I trust about what I’m feeling. Writing about it helps too. 
• Spend time outside every day. I work from home and it can be surprisingly easy to not leave the house. Even if it’s just a walk around the neighborhood, my spirits are always lifted from getting a fresh breath of air.
• Stopping myself from beating myself up for my imperfections. I’m not always successful here, but I’m working on it! 

And I could go on. The important thing is being able to recognize the lies that your inner gremlin is telling you and then thinking and acting in a way that shows to yourself that you are worthy of love and belonging. For me, that’s where loving and taking care of myself starts. I am beyond grateful for my time here in Paris because it forced me to really hone in on my self care routine. Paris is amazing, but it can also be very isolating if you’re like me and you don’t speak the language and you work from home. But doing the above things has helped me to honestly feel more consistently happy than I ever have.

If you made it this far, THANK YOU AND I LOVE YOU. And please know that you always have a friend in me if you need someone to talk to. You are loved. You belong. You are more than enough.